Thursday, May 19, 2016

People Read These


People Read These

I am overjoyed that so many people love these blogs.  My April 28th blog has two views.  One is myself and the other is someone that I showed the blog to.  I am so glad that my hard work is being appreciated.
I got an A for that blog post.  I am happy about that, as I put in some effort when I was writing the post.

I made a blog on January 29 that I received an A for as well.  That blog post has one view.

I got a D on an assignment that was completely subjective.  I love having a letter grade slapped on a paper about my personal beliefs.

These are all facts.

I was salty when I wrote this, and I don't feel like writing a new blog post.

Thursday, May 12, 2016

Aol Rlf pz 7

Aol Rlf pz 7

 Uvivkf ohz huf pklh doha P ht dypapun mvy aopz isvn wvza.  Oho!

Aol dlpnoa vm h fvbun hkvslzjlua mlthsl ivuviv "pz thfil ohsm" aoha vm h obthu alluhnly.  Mbu mhja?  Flz vy uv?  Pa hss klwlukz.  Pz fvby jopsk Zlao Yvnlu?  Uv.  Fvb nbfz zllt zv uvyths!

Dolu P ohk oly ohpy, P ohk npysz.  Ol hsdhfz avsk bz pa dhz zvtlivkf lszl'z.  P't zv wyvbk.

P hzzbtl fvb'yl hdhyl vm aol vunvpun lwpkltpj.  Aol ipykz ylhssf tlzzlk lclyfaopun bw.  Zwhpu dpss ulcly il aol zhtl hnhpu.

Dolyl'z aol wvyr?

Zhf "tltl" pu aol jvttluaz pm fvb buklyzahuk.

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Don't Tread On Me


Don't Tread On Me

 I open up Mozilla Firefox, and what do I see?  Bing.

What's wrong with that?  Bing is a great search engine.

I agree, but Bing decided that I would appreciate seeing this image gracing my home screen.

Now I'm no polar bear, but when I saw this picture of these two carnivores, I went into a fit of rage.

I am a vegan, and the sight of anything that eats animals disgusts me.

Animals aren't supposed to eat each other, that's why I'm a vegan!

I am repulsed by anything that eats other living things.

It's 2016, and Bing really triggered me.

I ought to sue Bing for setting my home screen to this image, but I won't.

All I ask, Bing, is that you don't tread on me.

Thursday, April 28, 2016

My TV Show Pitch


My TV Show Pitch

I like cartoons as much as the next person, but one thing that is lacking in the cartoon industry is mystery.  There are plenty of comedic and dramatic cartoons on cable television, but there are little, if any, mystery cartoons.  I think that this is atrocious, and I have designed a great idea for a mystery cartoon series.
My series takes place in the summer of 1969, when peace, love, and psychedelic drugs, were the three most important things in a young person's life.  My show features a group of four young adults that were part of this counterculture.  These characters include the classic archetypes that you find in any good television show -- the stoner, the nerdy girl, the well-dressed lead man, and the well-dressed girl acting as a damsel in distress.  On top of that, I had the great idea to add a dog into the mix.  The dog is a wildcard, but typically fits in with the stoner as they try to sate their unending munchies.

This group of miscellaneous teens and their dog will traverse the country in a van, something that youngsters did for fun back then.  They will stop at random destinations as they go, running into adults that do not appreciate the antics of the younger generation.  These adults dress up as monsters to terrorize the kids.  This initially causes fear and paranoia, symptoms to be expected from psychoactive substances.  When they come down from their highs; however, the kids will solve the mystery surrounding the "monster" while sober and aware.

On some occasions, the kids will come across what they believe to be actual monsters.  These are merely synchronized hallucinations derived from their psychedelic drug use.  They will coincidentally come down from these drugs just as they believe that they are solving the case, causing them to believe that they were actually dealing with the supernatural.

I believe that this series would make for a great show that both children and adults will enjoy.  The repeated allusions to drug use will be so inconspicuous that younger viewers will never pick up on it.  This series would fill a niche in modern cable television that no other show is filling, and it is sure to be very successful.

Thursday, April 7, 2016

Doctors Hate Him


Doctors Hate Him

You thought that I was going to write about product advertisements for physical enhancements, but I am not going to write about product advertisements for physical enhancements.
Regression stars Ethan Hawke and Emma Watson in a film about regressive hypnotherapy.  Emma Watson stars as a woman who claims to be molested by her father.  After using regressive hypnotherapy in order to bring out her repressed memories, Ethan Hawke, a detective, and his police department set out on an investigation that unearths possible satanic activity all over the United States.

The film was panned by reviewers, receiving a 14% on Rotten Tomatoes and 5.7 on IMDb.  I thought that the film was pretty good.

Thursday, March 31, 2016

Friday the 13th


Friday the 13th

Over the past week, I have watched every single Friday the 13th film except for the 2009 remake, which I saw previously.
These movies are awful, so awful that they are amazing.  The Friday the 13th franchise started as a way to capitalize off of Halloween's success, and the series has turned into a recurring box office success.  It is one of the most profitable franchises ever, grossing more than $460 million across all of the films with a cumulative budget of approximately $81 million.

I have no idea why these films are so profitable.  The standards for the franchise are extremely low, and even the best movies in the franchise are mediocre at best.  Despite this, I watched 11 of the films in the course of one week.

I would rate the films, in order from best to worst, as follows:

  1. Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
  2. Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives
  3. Friday the 13th Part III
  4. Freddy vs. Jason
  5. Friday the 13th (2009)
  6. Friday the 13th: A New Beginning
  7. Friday the 13th Part 2
  8. Jason X
  9. Friday the 13th (1980)
  10. Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood
  11. Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan
  12. Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday
I would not recommend any of these films apart from my the top two.  You're wasting your time if you decide to sit through of of these films.

Thursday, March 24, 2016

You Snooze, You Lose


You Snooze, You Lose

You snooze, 
You lose,
Ted Cruz.
You use
The Jews,
Ted Cruz.
You're wrought
And bruised,
Ted Cruz.
You lie
As you choose,
Ted Cruz.

You're Exhausted and Obsessed

You're predictable,
You're basic,
John Kasich.
You're blind
And need LASIK,
John Kasich.
You've lost
And you're depressed.
You're exhausted
And obsessed, 
But
You'll never
Beat
The best,
John Kasich.